Earth will stop having weather in a hundred years time

Scientists have released data that indicates that there will be no weather at all on this planet by the year 2117.

“They’ll be no rain, snow, hail or wind,” say the experts, “And it will be neither hot or cold. In fact, temperature itself will cease to exist.”

Head of Weather Research at the University of Michigan told the Daily Chronicle, “Imagine life with no weather at all. There’ll be no point looking out of the window first thing in the morning, and absolutely nothing to talk about when you meet someone in the street. Weathermen will have to find real jobs.”

“This dark, nightmarish, weather-free view of the future is quite disturbing to many,” a spokesperson for the London Weather Centre told us, “But it’s really nothing to worry about. There’s no reason why the Earth cannot survive without weather for thousands of years to come.”

Tomasz Schafernaker is available for weddings, bar mitzvahs and after dinner speaking.